what color is your nose hair?

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

I went to a super Irish Catholic elementary school, run by nuns and everything. In fact, my arch nemesis was this nun named Sister Bernice. She had it in for me, I tell ya.

Anyway, one of the hard parts for me about going to this super Irish Catholic school was that most of the people had red or blond hair. Red hair with LOADS of freckles was predominant. And they all knew each other from their Irish step dancing lessons and other Irish events. I, of course, was the brown haired brown eyed little latina anomaly. Thank goodness my best friend was also a brown haired brown eyed little latina anomaly, so I wasn't alone in my non-Irishness.

I used to wish desperately to be Irish. I felt like everyone except me and my best friend S was Irish.

One of the most traumatic moments in my childhood was in 5th grade when a band of little Irish step dancing red haired and freckled girls ran up to me during recess. The moment is vivid in my mind. 3 of them were named Megan. The Megans and the other girls initiated conversation with me and finally they got to the point. "We decided that we can't be friends with you," they said. "What? Why?" said I. "Because you have brown nose hairs and we decided that its gross." And just like that they walked away.

I was ashamed of my brown nose hairs until I got to high school and realized that the world was not predominantly Irish, and really, why were people looking up my nose?

If only I knew the Megans now and I could walk up to them and say, "but I bet you can't get beautifully tanned golden latina skin without even trying, now can you bitches?"