Sunday, December 20, 2009

the pooches

I took Tango and Murray in for a check-up on Friday and had another long talk (just one of several) with the veterinarian and the behavioral consultant. The consensus from everyone is that the best thing for the dogs is to go stay with our family friend, at least for a while, and see if things improve for them. The veterinarian felt that their health was actually deteriorating- Murray had lost weight, their heart rates were up, they seemed more stressed and nervous (both the vet and the vet technician commented on that), they seemed needier and more unhappy. Tango also has started to develop cataracts, which explains his extreme terror around the kids. He may not be able to see what they are doing clearly, and so everything surprises them and he lives in a constant state of fear.

My mom walked in the door from her flight after not having seen them for 6 months and asked, "what's wrong with Tango?" The change was obvious to her within 20 minutes. She said she hadn't seen him wag his tail and all he did was cower in the corner. A friend commented on the same thing the other day when he came to visit.

The bottom line, as the behavioral consultant keeps hammering home to me, is that sometimes you have to do the best thing for the dogs, even when it isn't what you want to do. We have to ensure they never ever bite the kids, and that means removing them from the current situation.

The plan is for our friend to come pick up the dogs tomorrow (Monday) and they'll go home with her. We'll keep evaluating as the days go by, but we're hoping we see an immediate improvement in them. If they seem dramatically happier, then they'll stay. If it doesn't work, they'll come back and then I don't know what we'll do.

I'm heartsick just thinking about tomorrow.

Making matters worse, Josh is away for the week in Germany and was supposed to be home today but has been delayed because of the storm. It is looking like he won't be here when she comes, and won't get to say his goodbyes to the dogs.

My mantra every moment I think about Tango and Murray leaving (which is approximately every 5 minutes) is that we are doing the best thing for the dogs. And the best thing for the kids. They shouldn't live with me yelling at them all the time either, which is what I've been doing because the dogs are so terrified all the time, I'm constantly managing everyone. I have to believe this is the right thing to do, and I have to believe the veterinarian and the behavioral consultant wouldn't tell me it was the right thing to do if it wasn't. If there was an alternative.

Still, tomorrow is going to be a fucking nightmare. I prayed and hoped it would never come to this. But this is the best thing for everyone.

It's the best thing for everyone.

It's the best thing for everyone.


Rev Dr Mom said...

I know it's hard, but you are doing what is best for everyone!


Chatty Cricket said...

it really IS the best thing, most especially for T&M bless their little hearts.

I think cataracts are super common in dogs with eyes like Tango and Murray- the SIL's Boston Terrier has lost his vision almost entirely. Poor bunny. A friend of mine had a dog with cataracts and she went from being a super loving totally mellow dog to being extremely stressed out and very wary around people, it was sad to see.

But anyway, back to the pups. I really truly believe this is the best thing you can do. I think they will thrive and with Tango's cataracts, you know your friend will be able to give him 100% attention.

Keep repeating your mantra because it's absolutely correct.

I will call you tomorrow.


Beth said...

It IS the best thing for everyone. Will be thinking of you tomorrow and hope that it all goes OK x

KLee said...

I'm so sorry that it has come to this. It has to be completely heart-wrenching for you -- these were your babies for so long! Just as if you would do something that you wouldn't normally do in order for your children to be healthy and happy, you must do the same for your furry children. I know it will hurt terribly, but you ARE doing what's best for them. They will be healthier and happier, and maybe you will still get to see them occasionally. Sending you love and hugs.

liz said...

Sending hugs.